flexibeast.space - gemlog - 2023-06-23

Topspace and topdrop

i've been in topspace, and experienced topdrop, on a number of occasions[a]. Here's a short summary of my experiences with both, and what i've learned.


For me, topspace involves an incredible feeling of power - a power constrained, yet one that could be overwhelming were it to be unleashed. It's a power that comes from not only having a substantial amount of control, but also being very aware of that; and it typically involves a sense of strength within a centred calm, rooted in knowing that one can dictate that things will be thus. More generally, it feels like being in ‘flow’[b], like being very present and “in the moment”.

However, my experience is that topping can also induce feelings of:

It might well be appropriate to manifest and express these feelings during a scene. Continuing to do so outside a scene, whether to a scene bottom(s) or to people in general, is another matter. i feel that, after a scene, it's important to try to pay attention to your social behaviours, and reflect on the extent to which others have consented to being treated as ‘lesser’. If you find yourself treating random hospitality or retail workers as peons, rather than as fellow human beings deserving of basic respect, you should take some time to bring yourself back down to earth and ground.


For me, there are two aspects of topdrop: the sense of power and/or superiority draining away of its own accord, and actively working to ground oneself.

Feeling the sense of power-over[c] drain away can feel depressing, to greater or lesser extents, due to a sense of loss. There might be an active internal resistance to letting this happen, for whatever reason, and this can in turn lead to the sort of social issues described above.

Some things that i find can help me ground / “come back down to earth” are interactions with water and/or earth, like: